Five Things That Make Us Joburgers

As inhabitants of one of the most exciting cities in the world, (voted by the New York Times) we share certain traits that not even that step-sister of a city in the Western Cape can relate to.


We Know How to Hustle.

Just because you don’t have a job doesn’t mean your bank balance becomes stagnant. From wheeling and dealing photocopiers and water coolers on the side to writing articles as a freelancer, Joburgers know how to make money – that’s what the city’s built on, right?

We Eat Deadlines for Brunch.

Because Johannesburg ticks to its own clock we tend to work a lot faster. You need that report by 11? We’ll have it done by nine. We’ve been taught from a very young age that if you stand still for long enough someone else will take your place in line.

We Think Everyone Outside of Joburg Drive Too Slow.

Have you ever been on holiday in the Eastern Cape and every single person on the road has never made use of their car’s third gear? Yup. That’s us, right. Just because the speed limit is 40 doesn’t mean we have to stick to it, right? Life is happening and ya’ll need to move, move, move.

We Think Everyone Inside of Joburg Drive too Fast.

Joburg is filled with a bunch of maniacs on the road. Just because the speed limit is 80 doesn’t mean you have to drive 220. But it’s okay if we do it because we really need to get to the pub…

We Know How to Drink – But is That a Good Thing?

Phuza Thursday was born in Joburg. That much is a fact. The working class in this town only need half an excuse to go out and drink. Oh it’s karaoke night? Let’s go have a drink! Oh, You’ve had a bad day at the office! Let’s go have a drink. As fun as it may seem to sing Celine Dion at the top of your lungs whilst under the influence every Thursday for the past eight years kind of boils down to, you having a problem.

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